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I haven’t made a life list, but I often use the same kinds of thoughts to make big decisions.  When I was trying to decide about whether to adopt children and become a (single) parent and had people in my life weighing in for and against, I thought about how I would feel at 65 and later - would I regret not becoming a parent?  I decided I would absolutely regret not being a parent, so I’m now the mom of two girls (the younger of whom put “slime” (a kind of play doh stuff) in the older girl’s hair while the older girl was sleeping last night - - and today is Spring picture day - so there was a long session picking out the slime this morning.  Still glad I’m a parent).

Wow, Connie, I think there will be some very heart-felt entries here, today! The first two that came to my mind is my current relationship with my mom. I live 3 time zones away, and talk with her regularly, but only surface stuff. Health, weather, etc..I would love to have her as a confidant about things, spiritual, world concerns. We have never really operated the same way, and I resented her a lot when I was a teen. I would like that to change.
-On a selfish front, I wish I had ‘networked’ a lot more with my professors/fellow art students when in college. I think creative careers need that feedback, as most of us work in solitude. I should have been less shy, and more willing to put myself ‘out there’..

My Life List #1 right now is to go to the ocean.  My parents have never been big on traveling so all of our family vacations were short day trips from our western Kentucky home.  Luckily my DH likes to take trips from time to time so eventually #1 will be a been there, done that.

Rhonda - I had never been to the ocean until just over three years ago.  And now I live here! (Virginia Beach) I highly recommend it. And my mom had never seen the ocean until ‘05.  I was glad I got to make that happen just before she turned 60.

My #1, other than things like seeing my daughter graduate college, be happy, give me grandbabies, would be to get to Europe.  Especially the UK.  I can’t even imagine getting to see architecture and ruins that have been around for hundreds or thousands of years.

I suppose have another baby (or adopt) would be in there.  And to get to the western part of our country.  I’ve never been further west than AR and there is so much that I’m missing.

Travel. I want to travel all over Europe and parts of Asia. Be fluent in a second language (despite all the studying, fluency still seems to elude me!)

Rhonda- I grew up literaly across the street from the ocean. Having lived next to it my whole life, I didn’t realize how amazing it was till I moved away. Now I am landlocked and desperately want to live by water again. I hope you get to see the ocean! It really is amazing

I kind of feel the same way about mountains. I would love to go see the Rockies and the Alps (and not from an airplane!)

Um, can this list include things like going up in a hot air balloon and washing Hugh Jackman’s back in the shower? (Or shaving it if he’s Wolverine.)

1. Find my soulmate

2. Visit Scotland

3. Take a year off and not have to worry about money.

4. Learn to be more assertive.

My #1 is finish my wip. I also want to travel
--Greece and England are my must-dos. I want to do a New England literary sites tour too. I want to have a poem published in one of the “BIG” mags.

Other items on my list--fly a kite again, teach someone to read, complete family history scrapbooks for the grands, retire while I am still young enough and healthy enough to do all the things I have been putting off until I retire. Not much really,

Oh Wow!  Won’t list my 25, but just a few:
(in no particular order)

*Go Hang-Gliding
*See the Grand Canyon
*Take my kids:  Disney World, Boston, Philadelphia, Washington D.C., Yellowstone, NYC and Seattle Before they get out of High School (They are now only 6 and 9 - Phew!)
*Learn to dance
*Learn to drive a Standard Transmission

I came way too close to meeting the Grim Reaper this past Monday and as I lay in a hospital bed these same life thoughts were running through my mind.  It was either that or go slowly crazy watching the daytime Judge (insert name) court shows that my 88 year old hospital roommate was addicted to. 

I was once fluent in two second languages but no more.  I’d like re-learn another language and I’d like to continue to travel and explore new places.

When I didn’t know if I was going to be here to greet the sunrise on Tuesday though I didn’t think about any grand adventures I might miss but of the people in my life.  I want to live to see the children I love grow up.  I want to help them, the teens and the 20 somethings in my life be strong, confident people, find their hea love and live long, happy lives.  I want to be a positive influence on their lives and I want them and the others in my life to always know that they were loved.  I don’t want to ever forget to tell them that. 

If I can have all that I’ll be a happy woman.  Of course, if I can have all that AND Hugh Jackman, preferably in a villa in Tuscany, I’ll be ecstatic!

Ann - I love your #3!  I would love to take a year off and not have to worry about money.  I must add that to my list!

Terrio & Jenn - Thanks for the encouragement.  A cousin told me after your first trip, the ocean keeps calling you back.  Her family now goes back almost every year.

Janga, I’ve always wanted to do history scrapbooks too but I never seem to find the time.  That’s going on my list.

Btw, are you counting down the days to retirement yet?  Has the excitement started to set it?

Oops...meant to say “set in”.

Good night PJ, are you ok? I hope you aren’t still in the hosp.!  (((hugs)))
I hear ya on the relationships, that’s the meat of it, isn’t it?

I want to move to Scotland.  Not permanently, but for at least a few years.

PJ - Oh my goodnes, what a week you’ve had!  You’re so right.  In the end grand adventures are nothing compared to those we love and being a positive influence in their lives.  I wish you well!

Hi Connie and everyone!

Rhonda, I lived in the Mid-west for 14 years.  One day, I looked at my hubby and said, I want to live at the beach.  I’m going with ya, or without ya.  I’ve lived here on the southeast coast for over 4 years now.  I’ve never regretted it. (Hubby is here with me too.)

PJ, I hope you are doing ok. Please get better. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

I have been thinking about my life lists just this past week.  The doctor found a mass on my ovary and had me a bit scared. I go in this next Thursday, but I’m convinced it’s going to be ok. 

-I would want to go horseback riding and see Wyoming and Montana. 

-I want to experience sitting in a lounge chair on a beautiful tropical beach while some gorgeous, shirtless man brings me drinks.

-I want to go sailing.

I’m home now and regaining my strength.  Thank you for your prayers and good wishes.

I had salmonella sepsis and fell ill with no warning at work.  Within 10 minutes of the first stomach cramp my vitals had dropped like a rock and I was unconscious.  I work on Main Street in a small town and I understand I was the main attraction on a quiet afternoon.  I’ve been told pretty much everyone on Main Street was there to watch me being loaded into the ambulance. 

Not exactly the way I’d always envisioned my 15 minutes of fame but at least I’m here to talk about it! 

Prudence, I’ll be keeping you in my prayers.  I hope everything will be okay.

I’m trying to figure out how I can retire at 55 and live in Cannon Beach, OR.  If I win the lottery, I just might be able to swing it.

I want to explore Tuscany and the Amalfi coast.

Get a Great Pyrenees.

I made a life list when I was about 18 on the verge of graduating high school. My BFF at the time and I wanted to figure out all that we wanted to do and see before we died. My mum still has that list. I remember listing things like I want to win an Oscar and a Tony for my brilliant performance on stage. I also included that I wanted to get my pilot’s license. My mum thinks it’s hilarious that I didn’t mention anything about a driver’s license, and to this day I still don’t have one.

In my last year at University, I took Accounting for a week (don’t really know why) but I remember the Prof telling us to make a list of everything we ever accomplished, cause apparently it’s a proven fact that those who keep lists are more likely to acheive their goals.

PJ and Prudence you are both in my prayers and I have also advised my “Prayer Gypsies”.

I have always kept a Life List.  Once I accomplish something, I delete it and then, in it’s place, I always add something else to it. I now keep that in a journal form and call it “Dreams & Wishes”. I try to look at it at least once a week to see what I will work on.

PJ - that sounds like a horrible, scary experience.  I think we’re all glad to hear you’re at the recovering end.  I hope it’s a quick recovery!  Prudence, keep those positive thoughts!  I’ll be including you in my prayers, too.

I was having a whiny day - kids are home, rain, filthy dogs, can’t get work done - but I’m now changing my attitude!

I agree with the others:  in my case, write a book (I only have a few pages, but at least I’ve started!), go to the UK, see my kids through college and into happy adulthood, retire with my husband one day.  I already live near on east coast, and I love being near the ocean, too.  (Terrio, I live in Norfolk.) I would like to see the Pacific, though!

<"I remember the Prof telling us to make a list of everything we ever accomplished, “>

oops I meant to say: I rememeber the Prof telling us to make a list of everything we ever wanted to accomplish, cause apparently it’s a proven fact that those who keep lists are more likely to acheive their goals

PJ, it just wasn’t your time, thank God. And you’re exactly right--it isn’t the adventures in the end...it’s the people.  I loved your list, btw....nothing like the reality of death to scare one’s priorities straight, ay?

My list has to do with others....and not one of these items can I control, but it’s still what I want for them. 

-I’d like my sister to figure out who she is without a man.
-I’d like my son to have a best friend
-I’d like my daughter to learn that saying things nicely brings joy to others, as well as endears her to them
-I’d like my grandmother to show my dad affection
-I’d like my husband to see his dad (it’s been 10 years)
-I’d like my mom not to stress

and…

-I’d like not to always feel so out of control

I didn’t follow directions, did I?

-go to England (including Lake District)
-get pubbed
-make a new friend every year
-listen better
-drink less
-be more patient with my kids
-be more patient with my sister
-be less judgemental (with my sister mostly)
-be a less serious mother so I can laugh more
-drive an antique pickup truck and have a dog in the back
-be able to cuss in front of my kids
-be able to eat out more often than not
-slowly give all my stuff away
-learn another language
-see my pond fish have babies
-grow wisteria without it over-taking the back yard

Lisa R - I don’t know if it is normal to the breed but my old boss had a Great Pyrenees and that was a Houdini dog.  She could get out of anything - read fence, gate, door…

TerriO - waving to Carolyn as I sit working in Norfolk right outside the airport… *g*

Connie, what were some of the items on your list?

PJ and Prudence—(((hugs))) and prayers to both of you!

I would like to complete my WIP--have a long way to go, but one of these days....

I’ve been fortunate to have traveled quite a bit, but I still want to go to Ireland--I’ve a bit of the Irish in me too, Connie.

- Fly a plane
- Learn to Irish step dance (should be good for a laugh)
- Spend a week at a fabulous villa overlooking the Amalfi Coast with my DH--our kids will be elsewhere--being waited on by our personal staff. *sigh*
- See my children grow up to be happy, loving, successful adults
- See the Aurora Borealis
- Go to Australia and New Zealand
- Simplify my life and not sweat the small stuff

Make hot wild monkey love to George Clooney.  Being the likablity of this ever happening is NIL, I should in theory then live forever since I can’t accomplish the list...right? 

1.  Get published
2.  Finish the book that I want published
3.  Make hot wild monkey love with...well, my HWML partner, whoever that sucker might turn out to be
4.  Go to Scotland
5.  Buy a house
6.  Get on the NYT Bestseller’s List.  Somewhere.  Even the very very bottom would be great.  Very contingent on 1 & 2.
7.  Find out for myself what is under a Scotsman’s Kilt.  (Really this should be moved higher up the list...)
8.  Get kidnapped by pirates.  Friendly ones.
9.  Have a couple kids.  (Do this before #8, because the pirates would be a vacation after a couple kids.)
10.  Figure out how to work all the options on my cell phone.

Life lists, huh?  Never been big on them but if I had such a list it would include:

-travel to Ireland, England, Spain, Greece and Italy

-own a house in County Wexford, Ireland, Santos Spiritos, Italy and somewhere on a beach

-stay healthy for myself and my family

-finish my WIP

-get published

-write a Regency or historical

-watch my kids grow and find their true loves

-go away once a year with my sister-friend sans partners and kids

-meet all the Squawkers and as many Squawkees as is humanly possible

-get to that villa with George Clooney....and maybe let Janga come for dinner

-learn to play the harmonica - no other instrument, just the harmonica

-finish my doctorate in Educational Psychology and get my name in the Journal of Human Computer Interaction again

These are in no particular order.  Except maybe the George Clooney thing!

There’s not that many things that I wish for as I’m the kinda girl that makes the most out of what I do have (it’s that whole don’t wish for unatainable things, cause you’ll only be dissapointed syndrome), but if I gave myself permission to dream big I’d wish for:

- A monthly visit to a spa for a massage
- A caribean cruise
- A looong trip overseas that will include a visit Irland and Scotland
- A husband who finishes his projects (14 yrs of living is an unfinished house can really be annoying)
- A son who can control his emotions and frustrations and can interact with others ‘normally’

**the last two can be achieved, the top three entries are my idea of dreaming BIG**

My verification word is ‘near72’. I think that means that’s how old I’ll be before I get to experience those things I mentionned above… Mmm, there’s another 31 years of dreaming ahead of me!!

Oh PJ, I’m so glad you’re okay!  You simply HAVE to live to a ripe old age because #5 on my Life List is to eat a lot more of PJ’s homemade chocolates before I die

PJ! Take care of yourself, pls! What would your dogs (and I) do without you? Not to mention Hugh would never discover what he’s missing!

Prudence, I like both your attitude (confidence) and your practicality (go in and have it checked out.)

Great blog, Connie! I thought about this long and hard, and really, I would like to go sit on a warm, sandy, quiet beach, douse myself with sunscreen, and watch some really big breakers roll in.

The fact that that is all I really want tells you how great my life is, and for that, I am extremely thankful.

PJ: I’m so sorry you were so sick and glad you are better! 

As far as life lists go, I havent’ kept one for years because life has been so busy!  Mostly, I’d like for my ds and ddil to have children so I could know my grandchildren!  And I’d like to have ds#2 find his happily ever after woman.  He’s ready to settle down -umm well, kind of - and wants to marry and have a family.  And, I’d love to live in England for a year or so.  <g> My pw is cause 93 - suppose that means I’ll make it to 93?  Hope so - that’s 40 more!

I already have way more than I ever thought I would.  I don’t have a whole lot of regrets or “should haves” in my life (which I just now realized because you asked the question, Connie!) I’m with a lot of you, though…

- see my kids reach adulthood and be happy, healthy and well adjusted
- share retirement with my DH
- travel to England, Scotland, Ireland, Italy
- travel to historical sites in the US (east coast, plantations in the south, etc.)
- spend a lot more “fun” time with those I love

But, the most important one is…

- be a “healthy” senior citizen.  I’m surrounded by seniors that do more drugs than the U.S. teen population during the 60’s!  I know I won’t be able to do any of the things I listed without my health.  And if what I’m seeing of the generation before me is any indication, I’m really scared!

Patty, let me be the first to say that you have been one of the most positive influences in my life. I value your opinion and advice when given, and I always knew I could go to you for anything. You are my aunt, friend and confidant, and I honestly don’t think I would be the person I am today if you hadn’t been part of my life. (Not to mention that chocolate chip cookie recipe you taught me as been a life saver!)

I can’t even begin to express to you how much you mean to me, and if I tried, I don’t think that my words could do my emotions justice.

I’m so glad to hear you are back on your feet. Dad kept me posted for every change and he and I were extremely relieved that Steve and Melissa were there with you. Otherwise you better believe we would have been on a plane heading up there. And I don’t fly for just anyone!

It’s amazing the damage a little bacteria can do to your system! Sheesh. Talk about scary.

*hugs*

Teresa, with your #5 as my incentive (I love people who love my chocolates) I have no other choice.  I simply HAVE to live to a ripe old age! 

Christina, thanks for the good wishes.  Smokey, my 10 yr old lab was beside herself when I didn’t come home from work Monday.  She hadn’t seen a suitcase leave the house so she didn’t understand why I didn’t come back.  She refused all food until I returned home Thursday.  She’s been busy making up for it since then.

Cassy, the puppy had great fun walking with neighbors and playing with the neighbors’ dogs.  When I got home she gave me the look that said, “Glad to see ya Mom.  Did you go somewhere?” LOL

(((Jenn)))

You have to give me warnings when you post something like that.  I need three tissues...at least!

Love you.

GANNON!!! I do Irish Step Dancing!!! I’ve been in it for seven years and it’s one of the best things in my life. I compete and do shows with my dance school on a regular basis (especially now with St. Patty’s day) and I can’t recommend it highly enough. Most schools have adult classes and it’s really easy to start.
Speaking of which, the other day you all were talking about Terminator 1 and 2… well, yesterday I did a dance show at the capital rotunda (in Sacramento) and got to meet Mr. Shwarzenegger himself!! It was pretty cool.
Ok, sorry about the tangent. What I want to do most before I die...just get out of school and LIVE!!! In October I’m going to Vietnam for six months to teach English to school children. That’s a good start
Oh, and my other life goal is to attend the Tony’s and be more active in theater in general.

Prudence, I’ll keep you in my prayers.  All sorts of good vibes, thoughts and anything else I can throw at you are coming your way!

I never knew we had a familial connection here on the Squawk!  Actually I may be assuming such a connection but it is beautiful none the less!

I love this place!

I think it’s wonderful that PJ and Jenn are aunt and niece!  Maybe this should be our new Squawk recruiting technique.  Come and bring your relatives--your aunts, your nieces, your mothers, your sisters, your mothers-in-law...well, your sisters! 

Santa, I agree, I love this place too.  When I’m at work, and the job or co-workers start getting to me, I escape by pulling up SR and reading what’s going on with everybody. 

And thank you to everyone for the good wishes.  The waiting is the most difficult and of course the unknown.

Santa, you’re so thoughtful! I’ll look forward to that dinner. Will you let me choose my main course?

PJ, just reading your posts makes me happy and thankful. Your “voice” sounds stronger today.

Prudence, you will be in my prayers too. Hugs and healing thoughts to you.

Hellion, I saw a book at the bookstore today that reminded me of your special wip. But I bet it’s not as good as yours.  Can you feel the “Finish L’s story” vibes that I am sending your way?

25 I want to eat an ice-cream cone in Antarctica.
24 I want to tell Queen Elizabeth a joke. And make her laugh out loud.
23 I want to take a class from those of you Squawkers & Squawkettes who are teachers. And, oh, I’ll attend as the Unedited Me.
22 I want to be the voice of a cartoon character.
21 Then I want be the Keynote Speaker at an important event, like a Board Meeting or a RITA thingidybob, and address everyone in my ‘toon voice.
20 I want to bungee jump off the Empire State Building.
19. I want to learn to belly dance.
18 I want to be good at pulling a rabbit out of a hat…literally & figuratively.
17 I want to have tea with the Baroness who has the same name as yours truly.
16 Then I want her to take me on a shopping spree. In Paris.
15 I want to wear a tiara and act mysterious.
14 But I don’t want all of the responsibilities that would go with having to wear The Family Jewels.
13 I want to have a gourmet food fight with some of the Best Chefs in the World. Bam! 
12 I want to buy a farm and raise something whimsical…like pet snails or aardvarks.
11 I want to have the courage to stand up and be counted.

10 I want to be the kind of person who says yes when I would rather say no.
9 I want to be able to resist spoiling my children.
8 I want to be able to spoil my grandchildren.
7 I want to always be wanted
6 I want to help build hospices in rural communities.
5 IF I have to die, and all of us do, then I want to die while I am having the Biggest Orgasm Ever.
4 I want to die with a smile on my face. (see #22)
3 A while ago my son asked me to send him crayons and coloring books. I wanted to weep. I don’t pray for World Peace any more. I just ask God to make this a World where every child can have the opportunity to sit down and color in peace…
2 I would like to live a life that is worthy of the sacrifices that others have made on my behalf. Sacrifices that allow me the freedom to post something on the internet or buy a box of crayons any damn time I want.

The man who asked for those crayons, was a father, a husband, and a solder, He was killed this week trying to give his countrymen the same things that I often take for granted. Simple things, like being able to buy a child a box of crayons.

1 And Finally, my # one goal; I want to be able to tell J Perry Stone NO!

Crud #4 should read SEE NUMBER FIVE!!!

Oh squawkers, someone must write a bloggy book! I’m feeling the vibe here! (OK, so I just finished JR. Ward’s latest!)
-Santa, I too, would love to meet all the Squawk community!
-PJ/Jenn, I’m in awe of you!

Patty gets all the credit for telling me about this site. If it wasn’t for her, I would never have known about this place.

Even worse, I never would have gotten to read so many good books you all have written/recommended!

Can I make it a life-long goal?  I’d say read one thousand books.

Alice

I posted before I read anyone else’s post because I didn’t want to be influenced by their answers. And all I have to say is …

Wow, I’m gone for awhile and…
PJ! I’m glad to hear that you survived your ordeal and are recovering at home.
and
Prudence, I’ll be keeping you in my prayers too.
and
Teresa are you really, Really, sure that you WANT to recruit any of my relatives? Especially my Sisters? In my family I am considered the Quiet Sister!

Connie, love the premise of this blog! Before I go off to become daisy compost, I want to:

1. Go to chef school
2. Learn Italian
3. Turn a book in to my publisher early (snort)
4. Get Sophia Loren’s mojo
5. Get scuba diving certified
6. Learn to write an entire book in rough draft
7. Go an entire year without forgetting anybody’s birthday

Wow, life lists, huh??  Okay, here’s mine:

1. Travel the British Isles and tour the castles, both standing and ruins, on my own time.

2.  Meet my soul mate, preferably on my Scottish tour.

3.  Land my dream job, or actually ANY job in my major.

4.  Loose weight.  (I told my mother that if I was ever in a coma with no chance for survival, she wasn’t to pull the plug until I was a size 8!!)

5.  Find a great pair of heels that A. Don’t feel like Machiavellian Torture Devices, and B.  Don’t make the rest of my legs look huge.

6.  Walk in the Breast Cancer 3-day.  This is for my sister, who is a 5 year survivor.

7.  Find a car that won’t break down constantly.  I seem to have the worst luck with whatever vehicle I am driving.

8.  Write the book that has been floating around in my head for so many years.  Parts of it are actually written down and on my computer, but it is disconnected so far.

9.  Learn to say no without feeling guilty for doing so.  (My mother is a travel agent for guilt trips, so I blame this on her!!)

10.  Stop procrastinating.  (I might have to wait a bit on this one, though )

11.  Build the dream house that I designed so many years ago.

12.  Balance my checkbook.

13.  Finally read all of the books on my TBR shelves. 

14.  Have flowers sent to me by someone ‘’just because.’’ I have never had anyone send me flowers before, so this will be a new experience.

15.  Be the one in the long white dress walking down the aisle for once.  (is it my turn yet?)

16.  Sing “Ave Maria” for my mother.

17.  Attend my high school reunion after I have lost weight and found my dream job so I can go to those who hassled the fat chick in high school and poke ‘em in the eye with my success.

18.  Have one of my designs show up as a feature in Architectural Digest.

19.  Attend the NCAA Basketball Final Fours (doesn’t matter who is playing).

20.  Travel to Australia and New Zealand.

21.  Fly first class anywhere.

22.  Sail on the QE II. 

23.  Skydive.

24.  Hang glide.

25.  Remember the words of Mame Dennis: “Live! Life’s a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!”

I guess I have a lot of work to do . . .

Julie,
Do I understand right that your son was killed this week?  If so, you have my deepest sympathies.  He sounds like a wonderful man who cared deeply for those around him.

CJ